The answer to all riddles

If you are new to the Oddyssey or having a hard time understanding what is going on here is a short list of mysteries and their answers to help you navigate through the literature.

The Lumpy - The lumpy is our author and hero. He is fighting to keep control of his household from what he believes to be a tiny invader he refers to as the Beast. Lumpy loves to read, hates noise and is in correspondence with a gentlemen named Mr. OR about his on going battle.

Lumpys Darling Wife - The Lumpy was and is happily married to a women that is having her mind controlled by The Beast. Hence she is often found fighting on the side of the Beast although from time to time she breaks the spell and gives Lumpy a chance at thwarting the Beasts plan to take over Lumpys household.

The Beast - The Beast in real life is, in fact, my (as of october 2005) six month old daughter who is the joy of my life but in the realm of the Oddyssey she is a tiny invader trying to take over the Lumpys happy home. The Beasts main weapons to date are Noise and mind control tactics as well as verious substances that the Beast is able to excreate from its different orifaces.

The Red Cross - Referes specifically to the Lumpys-in-laws who are another semi-antaganistic force within the Oddyssey (This is not factual in real life if they happen to be reading this). The Red Cross looks at the Beast as a Prisoner of war and; therefore, demands that the Lumpy treat the Beast humanly.

Various Lumpy Family Members - Until such time as these people become a fleshed out part of the Oddyssey they shall remain mainly keepers of the Beast while the Lumpy and his wife escape for one purpose or another or else a curiosity whose actions towards the Beast the Lumpy does not understand.

As I'm sure you have noticed there are some inanimate objects that play a role in the oddyssey as well and require a description.

Lumpys Box - Lumpy is a cubicle worker and is forced to spend many hours each day simply sitting in his box staring at the walls. This is how the Lumpy makes money for all of his plans. Why they pay him to do this he is still unawares.

Torture Devices - Lumpys torture devices are in actuality the standard toys and carseats and other baby parafanalia that most of us receive at baby showers. The Lumpy doesn't understand that these things are to keep the Beast safe and happy as the Lumpy can not comprehend why someone would want to do such a thing.

The Beasts Plastic Bottom - This is refering to diapers which The Lumpy began buying and wrapping the Beast in after his wife threatened to wipe the Beasts soiled bottom on The Lumpys favorite reading chair.